The Countries of My Life
by TheGrammarHawk
Summary: When you live in a house full of characters, especially countries, things go wrong. Especially when they start butting into your life, personal and not! A crackfic in which I, TheGrammarHawk, must endure the countries of Hetalia being all up in my business, for better and for worse. When they get involved in school... romance... my sister? T for swearing and being cracktastic!
1. Chapter 1: Just Me

**Disclaimer: I do not own ANYTHING. NOT HETALIA OR WHATEVER. The only thing I can claim to own is myself.**

**AN: You've passed the first test. You're reading this. Okay, so, the narrator is ****_me_****, TheGrammarHawk. This is a fic with lots of crack because my life is very weird and random when the countries of Hetalia get involved... Also, this was mainly inspired by an idea from Snow and Night the sisters. Check out their work too! :)**

...

Hey, everyone. You all know me, hopefully, if you're reading this fic here.

If you're reading this fic and you don't know me… well, you can call me Hawk. Obviously, I wouldn't share anything personal that could allow creepers to find me. I mean, there are some things I may say… quirks of mine, we'll call 'em, that I may talk about.

Oh yeah. Before we start, I'd like to say this. I'm an author on this cool site. It's called . Of course… if you didn't know that… why would you be here?

Anyways, what you're reading is being narrated by me. Hawk. I'm weird, so this is going to be interesting.

So my parents are on vacation. They normally are very smothering, but now they're spending _quite_ a while in the Bahamas. Not that I mind, it's just… odd. They've left me and my sister alone here.

Of course, we're not _alone_. I mean, as an author, I like to say that every character that's ever been in a story of mine lives in my house. It's quite crowded here, actually. I've written… a lot. More than you know. But sometimes they disappear or leave me alone for a while.

Most of them are right now. Very peaceful, just me and my sister running around the house and causing havoc for each other. The neighbors – on request of our parents – check up on us ever few days. Like we're plants or something that need watering, I mean, really? I'm sixteen, my sister's thirteen, we can take care of ourselves. Sheesh.

My life can get really random, though. I'm naturally quite easy-going and relaxed, but sometimes things happen and… well, I get_ really_, _really_ pissed. And when I'm angry or upset, I may seem to get over it pretty fast like it was no big deal, but inside, I'm brooding. I remember nearly everything that way. Emotionally.

And when I'm _really_ angry, upset, or even happy, I can be… quite extreme. And I have a lot of emotions… they just get bottled up.

I do really strange things with my friends – human and characters – and I am often viewed as strange myself. That's not wrong, just… not always nice.

And I can have a few problems. You see, not _everyone_ has been  
leaving me alone in my fictional world. Some people are just getting way too interested in my life. And my school. And my _personal business_.

Oh, yeah… and they're not humans. They just happen to be… countries. And they're starting to get involved.

Isn't this about to get bloody interesting?

...

**AN: So now's your chance to learn about me, I guess. The countries are about to invade my life at home, at school, with my sister, and my romantic life. Of COURSE, you are given information about me. But you'll have to guess whether it's real or fake. I wouldn't underestimate me. My age? Am I sixteen? Younger? Older? I'm not telling you. My sister's age, too, may as well be fake. Real or not real? Couldn't resist that... But don't try to stalk me, enjoy the ****_countries_**** stalking me. Lots of crack coming up!**


	2. Chapter 2: Night Trouble

**Disclaimer: I do not own ANYTHING. NOT HETALIA OR WHATEVER. The only thing I can claim to own is myself.**

**AN: So, obviously, I won't be using my real name. While I will be called Hawk on occasion, my name for this story shall be Annabelle Cheryl Jones. My sister is Alyssa Eve Jones. Just to clarify. Not real names. :)**

...

"ANN… A… _BELLE!_"

I flinch, opening my eyes with a groan. I know that voice. Damn…

"What do you want, 'Lyssa?" My little sister, Alyssa. I have to yell back at her.

It's Saturday! Come on! Seriously? Is she really going to wake me up?

Wait a second… Alyssa wakes up closer to eight in the morning. I wake up at five, and it's obviously still dark out. I open my eyes, looking at the clock. It's lit up by a laser, so I can see it. Of course… I can see it, but I can't _read_ the time…

I fumble for my glasses, and finally put them on. A whimper escapes me. "Three in the morning…?"

Then I realize that my sister was screaming for me. At three AM. She didn't like to be up at this time, and she doesn't really like me.

I get up, running in the dark to her room. I throw open the door. She stares at me, also grabbing her glasses.

"What's up, Alyssa?" I ask blandly, not seeing any immediate danger. She looks at me crossly. "There's someone making noise downstairs, below my room. Can you see what's going on?"

I rolled my eyes. "Seriously? You big baby." "_Annabelle…_" "Fine!"

I tromped down the stairs, not sure if I should be doing this. My parents would _kill_ me…

I entered my kitchen, which was below her room. It was dark, and a chill went up my spine. I was alert. I have… Nyctophobia… Fear of the dark. It's not that bad, but it freaks me out. I'm a wuss. I'm aware.

I glanced in, and saw a few dark shapes. I flicked on the lights.

"WAHH!" I jumped at the yells. Three guys, all in tee-shirts and jeans, were stalking around the room. Three guys that I did not want to meet while in my pajamas…

Let me get this straight. My pajamas? Well, my top is held on by two straps that are the width of yarn. It hangs down _very_ low. My shorts are so short; I doubt my entire butt is covered. Hey! I don't buy these things, and it's _hot_. I already sleep with the fan on every night already. It's not like people typically see me in my teen-pajamas.

And the people lurking in my kitchen just _happen_ to be the Bad Touch Trio, France, Spain, and Prussia. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely adore Prussia, and France and Spain aren't bad, but this was _not the time…_

France's face turned to delight. "Ah, Annabelle, ma chère, you look very… merveilleux tonight…" He extended a hand in the general direction of my chest. I roll my eyes. "Francis… Touch me and I'll kill you." He shrunk back, familiar with my… ways of torture.

I glance at Prussia – he's the only one of the three that I actually have some faith in. "Gilbert… why are you guys up here at three in the morning? Alyssa and I are trying to sleep… I thought I locked all of you in the basement…"

He looks apologetic, but just slightly. "Yeah… But when we tested the door, it gave this time. Lucky, too, we were about to ask America to break it open." I sweat-drop just thinking about that. "Guys… please go sleep…" "Sure, Annabelle…" Spain says. He looks tired. Why were they up here anyways?"

I push all of them to the basement door, and with a shove, France and Spain fall down the stairs.

There's a flash of light near me, and I whirl. I just catch Japan hiding. Fury blazes my cheeks red.

Prussia laughs his obnoxiously familiar 'kesese' laugh. "Aw, Anna~… You're so cute in your pajamas. Trust me, we'll enjoy the pictures!"

"GILBERT!" I shout, shoving him down the stairs, embarrassed. "I'M GOING TO KILL YOU FOR THAT!"

I hear his yell from down the stairs. "Yeah right, Anna~ We all know you wouldn't hurt _me_! I'm too awesome for that!"

I sigh. He's right. I wouldn't actually hurt a fly… Maybe America. But he's special.

Japan bows slightly before heading down the stairs. He gives me a slight smile before giving me the camera. "Here. I don't think that they'll _actually_ need the pictures. You can dispose of them if you want."

I take it and kiss him on the cheek. "Thank you Kiku. You're a life saver." I close the door behind him, and carefully bring a chair over.

"There. I hope those guys don't come out again…" I sigh, trudging upstairs with the camera. I place it on my dresser, and lock my own door. Only a few of them have actual permission to be in here, and the others stick pretty tightly to that room.

I snicker as I crawl back into my bed, placing my glasses down. "They have no idea… How bad I can get…"

...

**AN: Sorry if Annabelle's weird at all, but she's based off of me. She plays favorites with countries, but don't we all? Review? It's my first anniversary of being on fanfiction, so check out what I've done in the past year!**

Translations - From Google Translate, no less, so I'm sorry if they're wrong!

ma chère ~ my dear (French)

merveilleux ~ marvelous (French)


End file.
